A Collection of Good DDlg Resources & info for the Beginner or curious ( Great for BDSM Daddys ,Caregivers,too)

I have almost 7 years Experience in the DDlg world & 3+ Decades in the BDSM World (in one form or another), I have never experienced a Vanilla relationship or sex (Vanilla=non kink/BDSM), I am no expert, I don't think anyone is as the learning never stops, I do however know what to look for and the keywords to use when I am hunting down information,  I always provide links to the resources, and give credit to the original authors, (it's the right thing to do) feel free to use anything in my Blog, just kindly drop a link to my blog and give me some credit for providing you with content and info, also include a link to your blog/post I'd very much like to read, if you leave a link in the comments to your blog on any site I will follow and post your blog link on the side bar so others can find you as well --->
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DDlg Briefly explained in the simplest terms :

What is DDlg?.. DDlg is short for Daddy Dom & little girl, MDlg is Mommy Domme & little girl, CG is Caregiver as some are neither Daddy or Mommy, and there are little's who are boys as well... a DDlg-MDlg-CGlg relationship is between 2 CONSENTING ADULTS never any minors/underage/non adult, littles, the minors will argue that they are littles, but the reality is NO they are NOT, they are simply role players, not actual littles, avoid them like the plague, you can get in huge legal trouble talking to them, remember 14 will get you 40 (years in prison) ... just avoid anyone under 18 and you will be fine. 

I, like the vast majority Do NOT support minors at all anywhere near this way of life or anywhere near any part of BDSM or the community.

DDlg is on the outer fringes of the BDSM Umbrella as it is on the border of taboo, &  makes many people in the BDSM community uncomfortable, and it can down right freak the Vanilla world out, the most common misguided and very wrong thoughts are.. pedophilia, incest, or Daddy issues... Non of which is remotely true... it is a different type of Dom- sub dynamics and relationships nothing more.

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DDlg Resources & info

I came across this WordPress blog some time ago and thought it to be cute and very informative & has some good recipes on it as well,  good information from a little's POV 

BDSM Playpen

This one states its the ultimate guide to DDlg Relationships, it is extremely informative, has videos and links galore, has quizzes and much more, it is written in easy to understand words and can take you down deep into the rabbit hole with the plethora of links and info.. it's very helpful ....

Ultimate DDlg guide...( great resource and info site)

This is a great site, the post on it is from a little who explains what it's like to be in a DDlg relationship, it's beautiful and will paint you an honest picture of what life can be like in this dynamic, keep in mind everyone's dynamics are different but we all share 1 common core, and that is we are DDlg-MDlg-CGlg ( or b)

what it's like to be in a DDlg Relationship

Okay, last link for this post, here is another splendid resource, explains DDlg Beautifully, also has links and a plethora of resources, to take you even deeper into the proverbial rabbit hole....  

What is a DDlg Relationship (resources & info)

I hope this has been of help to anyone reading this, if you have any questions or would like more information about BDSM or DDlg or any thing under the BDSM umbrella feel free to ask in the comment section, I try to keep this blog in very simple layman's terms easy to understand words as I am writing this blog with the Curious or Novice in mind, but the blog itself is for everyone (Adult) regardless of experience or knowledge. 

I am by no means an expert in anything, I am experienced in a great many things but that does NOT make me an expert at all, I am always learning something new, I am constantly researching and networking with others.

Have a great night/Day all xoxo

Lesli 

Name Please? A New Collar,Don’t EVER ask your Daddi how boys do it ! & some random stuffs

Cross posted from my WordPress Bloggy ( link to Chaos Inc. is on the right side bar) ---> Also the Link to Worthless girl, my Non Kink, Abuse & Humanity issues is on the right ---->
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DECEMBER 23, 2016

So today at Uncle Doom’s there was a lull in the chaos and Daddi took that time to do some online stuffs, and i just sat on the floor at her side kinda just resting while she wrote in her blog, i dunno what she writes in there and im not really all that curious either, she did some stuff up on okru ( why do i say up? ) and she looked through my tumblr and livejournal an my instagrams cuz Daddi keeps a very close tabs on my online activities, and i am perfectly fine with that,i actually find comfort in that and makes me want to try harder to learn my lessons , and to serve to the best of my abilities, that an i feel loved cuz she cares enough to keep me safe not just out here in life, but also online.

Anyway, my Daddi goes onto some sites that im not allowed on without her permissions , an really i have no businesses bein on those sites cuz i got everything i could ever want or need in my Daddi , an my family too so i am a happy an content girl , Daddi gots lotsa friends on those kinda sites, all Dommy types so ya i dont wanna be there evers. so she was on one of these sites i dunno which one its a black page thats all i know an one of her friends sent her a link to a quiz, an Daddi took that quiz while chattin to her friends , an she sent that quiz to everyone in the family including meeeee!! an i did the quiz an its  not accurates it says im a brat an im not, ifn i was a brat my Daddi would skins me alive , i might be mischievous sometimes,  but no not a brat, seriously, no, just no.

so here is the link to that Quiz ifn you wanna take it for what Daddi says sh!ts n giggles ..

BDSM Test << just clicks that , an ifn you are vanilla ( means you don’t do anything BDSM or D/s etc ) you should take it an you will either have a laughs an maybe learn somethin or you will be traumatized ! either way it’ll be funs !! ahahahahaha

So Imma gonna post both Daddi’s Quiz results and mine  (yes I have permissions, I am not suicidal I dont go near Daddis stuffs without permissions ) … an im gonna picks both of them aparts , well as much as i know Daddi so i might not be able to do much on hers

Daddi’s first cuz Daddi always goes before me 

Daddi’s results :

= Results from bdsmtest.org ==

99% Dominant   << this would be right

96% Rigger          << this would be right, an she knows where to put the knots

95% Sadist            << oh yip yip yip, she is deliciously Sadistic

94% Daddy/Mommy   << ummm she is my Daddi

94% Degrader               << yip yip yip when we are playin she calls me things

90% Master/Mistress   << umm yes , but to me she is just very stern Daddi those times

87% Brat tamer               << yip yip yip, she would beat the brat outta anyone who belonged to her

87% Owner                     << ummm yip yip yip she owns my piddly @ss

84% Primal (Hunter)   << oh yip yip yip she likes to be the big bad wolfs an hunt me down

83% Experimentalist    << i don’t know ? she hasn’t guinea pigged me so i dunno

59% Voyeur        << ifn that includes watchin me dance for her or doin things to myselfs yip yip yip

55% Non-monogamist  <<  huh? Nooo!! she is very monogamy with me

32% Exhibitionist           << oh yip yip yip , she has no problems nailing me in public

32% Ageplayer     << umm no no , just no, but she is like a big kid when she is with Uncle Doom

5% Vanilla            << ahahahahahahah no, oh very much no she ain’t vanilla *laffin*

2% Masochist      << i dunno, doubt it but maybe

2% Switch            << *snort* oh h3ll no she aint ahahahahahahaha

1% Primal (Prey)  << no, she finds it amusin when i try an sneeks up on her

1% Brat      << AHAHAHA  ohhh im dyin !! no she is NOT but she can be Bad Daddi sometimes

1% Rope bunny   << Bahahaha , not a chance, try an tie her up, an end up danglin from the ceiling

1% Degradee       << ya, seriously I dare ya to try to her face, no, she dont play that game

0% Girl/Boy          << correct ahahaha  No she ain’t, be funny ifn someone called her one tho

0% Pet                  << correct  AHAHAHA oohh no no no ahahahahaha

0% Slave               << correct Bahahahaha oh h3ll no

0% Submissive    << correct  No , she is not  ahahahahahaha

an now mine :

Results from bdsmtest.org ==

99% Submissive  << yip yip yip my entire life,born this way i guess

98% Rope bunny  << oh!! yip yip yip i like bein roped up  !!

96% Girl/Boy     << yip yip yip , I has a Daddi so yip for sures

95% Degradee   << yip yip yip, i like it when she is playin with me,or whispers in my ear in publix

94% Brat            << NO! i am NOT! im just mischievous n sassy just enough to get Daddi smirkin

92% Masochist  << yip yip yip , i am not the least bit ashamed to admit to bein a pain slut

86% Primal (Prey)  <<yip yip yip Daddi taught me this game an its fun fun FUN

85% Experimentalist  << pretty much I like to try new things even if it goes south or hurts bad

84% Ageplayer   << ummm yip yip yip , I am Daddi’s lil girl always,

82% Slave              << FECK NO!! I was for many years, but not no more, never agains

38% Non-monogamist  << WRONG!! cuz i am loyal,so much so i stay even when i shouldnt

28% Exhibitionist   << ummm kinda, i’m getting used to gettin played with in publix

26% Pet   << NO!! not no more , long ago i was a human pet to a Mistress , no more ever!

6% Voyeur  << not really no, im not gonna leave the room if you start havin sex, but not watchin u

2% Daddy/Mommy  << Me?? * nearly faints * ahahaha no, just real protective of other littles

1% Sadist   << NO!! i never was, an never will be, causing pain hurts me not makes me feel good

1% Primal (Hunter)  << NO, but Daddi lets me try cuz it amuses her

1% Degrader  << nope , i don’t do that , not even jokingly

1% Vanilla  << Moi?? well i am just an innocent girl i know nuffin  ahahaha hardly

0% Brat tamer  << Correct! cuz i ignore brats completely

0% Switch   << Correct! Daddi let me try an no, i cant im a submissive n proud of it

0% Rigger  << Correct! but i am trained in asian rope bondage,i can make u look pretty

0% Dominant << Correct! not even my farts are dominant

0% Owner << Correct ! cuz i will never ever own anyone, not even my own piddly @ss

0% Master/Mistress <<  Correct , I haven’t got the desire, want or need to ever be anything but Submissive !

So my Daddi most likely would have a different response i would think cuz i look at it from a submissive point of view every answer i gave is from my sub view as well as my replies  to the quiz answers on both Daddi’s an mine , Daddi would probably be answerin from her Daddi Dom points of view .

So I hope that amused you cuz the quiz is just for entertainment its not psychic an cant tell you about you accurately and the answers are hit n miss and not always accurate cuz the questions are kinda vague and worded in ways that just dont fit with you . so ifn you want a laugh go do the quiz 

so Imma gonna set this to auto post an cuddle with Daddi til its my bed time.

lesli << a happy girl cuz i can now take my apple juice without bein embarrassed no more, cuz Daddi is a good lesson teacher.

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(I was so proud of myself . I was bottle fed my apple juice and at first it was humiliating, and I was proud of myself cuz I wasn’t fighting that anymore and was getting used to it) 

A DDlg Family Thanksgiving/"little stinkers”/stuffed/jannie’s stealth Jedi thiefering skillz/final thots

Cross posted from my WordPress Bloggy, feel free to click the link and follow that one too, it contains more, and is not a beginner/novice/curious info blog, its my life...

Chaotic princess WordPress Chaos Inc.

I got out smarted again… I was at Daddi Kass’s for thanksgiving & got outvoted..Kass 1 me 0 .. n jannies 0.5 vote that she got from buttwigglin n that devilish smirk she gets… darn princesses anyway!!…. the vote was very simple… here is a onsie… put it on… simple huh? … now, most would say yes Daddi n run off to change… cept she is no longer my Daddi… & being that she is NOT my Daddi.. I mistakenly thought that I would be able to say no thank you…, I honestly thot it was optional n that I would for once in my piddly life like to actually SIT at her table and eat from my own plate.. HA!!!..Wrong!!

yep since the first time I was at Kass’s house  years ago til present.. not once have I sat on a kitchen chair & ate off my own plate at the table.. I did sit in a kitchen chair Once, & only once… I was tied to it so ummm yeah.. that is when she explained how I would be eating and drinking my milks from now on…. I thot she was frickin jokin til she actually force fed me…. I wouldn’t co-operate so she pinched my nose holes shut til I had to open my mouth to breathe!!… she is no longer my Daddi, but the rules are still the same.. I knew about the eating rules n the milks, thats normal with her or Aunt Jessie, Chriss, Uncle De or even Simone, same rules apply in all their homes… very unified, consistent and structured.

So… jannie n me were skunks!.. matching skunk onsies.. with feets!, they put mittens on us, they had paw prints on the palm, no thumbs. this made holding anything nearly impossibles… ugh!!.. so that’s not a bad thing, Uncle Kass has dressed me like this since forever I am quite used to it and have gone out to the stores with her like this, no big dealz ( traumatizing Vanilla folks is my sole purpose in life.. or one of them anyway)

this is a Google image

I got my butt too close to Uncle Kass’s bedroom door, jannie took my tail n stuck it in the door n closed it… grrrrr!!!… hard wood floor, very slippy, I wasn’t goin no wheres, I couldn’t stand up, I couldn’t turn around and open the door n free my tail, couldn’t even crawl away n use pull power to free my tail ( on the onsie) cuz with mitts n feets , I just sorta spun out, couldn’t get traction…. n then, jannie waddled away… she just left me there!! thats just mean.. and it’s something I’d do to her, she has no business raiding my stash of evilness and using it against me!!… thats… thats…just frickin low down no good sassafrasing EVIL!!!! … the devil ain’t got horns, the devil has boobs, blue eyes and long blond hair.. last seen waddling towards the dining room disguised as a frickin skunk!

I never went out to Uncle Kass’s just for thanks givings, I was there a couple weeks, healing, I took a pretty big blow to the self confidence and identity, very personal hurtful ignorant comment that still has me pretty messed up, but I am mending… whenever I am in emotional or mental trouble I always run to Uncle Kass, no one knows me as well as she does, no one ever will either, no one bothers to put that much time and energy into me.

The same person who totally crushed me ( I forgave him, but I won’t ever forget cuz I’m the one that has to deal with the consequences of his ignorance.) anyway.. that guy, let it slip that he had his doubts about Ford being assaulted by the new supreme court judge…. that removed the last bit of trust I had, I can love him but will never trust him now, if I ever get assaulted again I will just keep it to myself…. he isn’t the man I thought he was, and I am so disappointed, I’m not angry, just feel let down and somewhat betrayed. so I have some serious personal choices to make when it comes to him… and I will sort that out on my time)

Anyway, Uncle Kass is like my savior, she always takes care of stuff & she helps me learn and understand, and also helps put me back together when @ssholes strip away my self confidence, the entire family (including my pain in the @ss subsister jannie)helps a great deal, to be honest I am not sure I’d still be here (alive) if it wasn’t for Uncle Kass & the famjam, I really can’t picture my life without them being a part of it

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I am a fiend when it comes to stuffing, I love, love,LOVE stuffing, ‘specially Aunt Jessie’s, Holy Macaroni’s can she make awesome stuffings!!! … did I mention that I LOVE Stuffing??, she puts diced apples and orange slices in before shoving it in the turkeys rear end.. the results are a fruity smelling stuffing that is amazing!! the apples and oranges don’t over power the sage n other spice stuff, and the shredded veggies she has in there.

Google image

So I was told that Aunt Jessie would be my CG for the day, n that’s fine I enjoy being with her cuz she is always happy n smiley and very affectionate… have you ever tried to grab a hold of your food pillow with mittens? .. n then you gotta make it from behind the toy chest (actual toys, Lego etc), to her.. at the table… and just to add to you’r frustrations.. you can’t walk upright ( if you do, you get locking cuffs on your ankle and that will have a short chain clipped to the harness around your waist, that they will put you in), my food pillow is really just a giant dog pillow/bed/cushion thing, but it’s the one I use at food times, so it’s my food pillow ( kneel or sit on it), there’s is just no way to carry this thing with mittens and not bein able to stand… ( I was not hobbled, I am trained enough to know better)

I ended up biting a corner n just pulling it while backing up, easiest way, jannie just keeps flipping hers end over end til she gets it where she needs it… as it turns out I can go faster in reverse than I can forward.. strange.. oh well. As per usual I never had my own plate, I never do when I am out there or with them anywhere…including Juliana’s pizza ( public licenced to serve alcohol pizza restaurante) serves more than pizza. I got a taste of everything and decided I wanted the stuffing more than candied yams, and wow did she feed me stuffings!! oodles of it, and yep she smothered it in Chriss’s gravy ( no one can beat Chriss in sauces n gravies, she is the absolute King of that domain)… I went way beyond my full capacity, she just kept bringing that spoon to me n I snarfed it down til I just couldn’t get anymore in, yes I had turkey n hams taters and lots a stuff. Thanksgiving at Uncles house or any family home is a 3 day food fest, as are all major holidays… you show up at Uncles house skinny she will let you leave after she has fattened you up and not before.

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So… jannie has perfected her thiefing skills and has graduated to Jedi level! ( or sith), after Dinner the turkey n stuff was knockin both jannie n me ( pretty much everyone too) out… turkey n stuffings coma!!!

after our milks we were sent to her private bedroom to nap, Uncle De followed behind cuz jannies room is up stairs on the second floor, the stairs are slippy when your in a frickin onesie, no carpet just oak, they are a bit hard on the knees but if you take your time it’s not that bad, I’m just a bit outta practice, surprising what a couple months of walking upright 24/7 will do to your scootin skillz!! Uncle was there behind us holding our butts as we waddled up the stairs to make sure we didn’t slip n have gravity f*ck us right up!

we made it, no accidents or fatalities and Uncle tucked us into jannies bed for our nap , I was asleep before my head hit the pillow I think and that is when jannie made her move..

it is no secret that I do indeed use a pacifier, its adult sized, (ABDL) and I am not the least bit embarrassed, I use them in public as well, yep people stare but no one has the balls to say anything, and if they did, if it was nice nothing would happen except me smiling, if it was negative, a knee to the groin and then to the head when they double over usually silences them…. I am sorry but I am not taking any sh!t from mainstream society… your rules  do NOT apply to me!! 

My Pacifier

Anyway, it was pinned to my onesie with a large safety pin n some purple ribbon and it musta fell outta my mouth or she took it, either way she got my darn pacifier n was using it with me still attached at the other end!! ..THIEFS!!…. and Uncle Kass & Aunt Jessie have the incriminating photos, both of us in a dead sleep and her with my pacifier!! arrrggghhhh!!!!!

it's an ABDL sized Pacifier, ones for infants are too small & don't look right to me,( yes I have one of those to)

I dunno why, but since I have known her she has thiefed my pacifiers, she has her own, she has lots, and at least 6 are mine, or were, when ever Uncle Kass n jannie come to my house I run around stashing my pacifiers cuz jannie turns into light fingers louie!!.. I have no frickin clue why she does that to me, except to irk me, n she excels at that! she doesn’t bother with my milks, or swipe my snacks just my pacifiers, I don’t get mad anymore, I used to, but the madder I got the wider her smirk got so I just shuts up about it, she knows I won’t smack her or anything and she knows I gave up being mad… now I just get irked.. and most slightly miffed.

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So as those who follow me on Facebook may have noticed that I have been spending less and less time there, I will continue to whittle down my time spent on Facebook til I get to an hour or less per day or every few days … it’s too heartbreaking for me, the political sh!tshow in the USA, I am watching a country I once loved and greatly admired become a third world Fascist Republic.

I was gonna delete my accounts ( both of them) but then decided I will leave them and just ghost , watch my friends and lovers quietly, maybe say something from time to time, this way I have a heads up is sh!t hits the fan, just because I am going stealth doesn’t mean I will always be there watching, just once in awhile check in, let a few folks know I am alive n kickin.

I spend most of my time working on music, I am almost caught up with my studio tracks, and have written 3 songs and one 4 part chamber music tune all for a single instrument, in this case a 6 string electric … have you ever tried to write a classical music piece using nothing but  a 6 string electric guitar? .. I thot my head was gonna explode more than a few times, most classical is done on a 12 string or more,, yes it can be done on a 6 but for best results a 12 or more is suited for classical, try writing a 4 part Epic music piece expressly for a 6 string… I have no idea what it would sound like on a 12 or more, it’s not written for that, if I was curious I would send it to Dr. Viossy or Malmsteen, if anyone could pull it off it would be either of them… but I am not that curious, so until I get it copyrighted I will just keep it to myself, has a lot of arpeggios in the first and third movements, and the real kicker, I wrote the entire d@mn thing in Tablature.

So ya, This happened right at the beginning of October …

Not my ATV....

so yeah.. that sucked!.. it’s winter, hopefully it is just 6 months (wishful thinkin), the reality is this is Saskatchewan, 7 months is the norm.. 7 frickin months of minus 45 – minus 55 and snow lots of snow, last winter was 8 freakin months!..8 MONTHS!!.. why? just why?? … cabin fever is real!, at least this winter I have my son so between the 2 of us I should be able to remain half @ss sane!

So I finally broke down and paid for spotsify .. and fudged that up… of course I did! ( I am an expert fudger upper) … I meant to get the family plan, but did I? nope.. I have the basic paid one, which left my son with commercials …dang it!! so I will fix that this weekend sometime, I think the family plan allows up to 5 people? I am not sure, anyway other than my son and I I will have 3 open slots, I will let Hammy give a slot to one of his friends, and keep the other 2 in case somethin ever happens to this one. I wish it was possible to find friends outside of Facebook on it though, I have friends on Twitter and elsewhere I’d like to hook up with on Spotsify.. irks me that Facebook dominates everything dang it… I really have a severe dislike of that mental midget zuckerberg!

So I am gonna end it here ( the bloggy post) and since I have the house to myself til Sunday , I am gonna get naked and dance my piddly @ss off while cleaning up my house a bit.

Lesli << Rockin it to Spotsify ….

Heat~ Lowcash

BDSM 101: Consensual Non-Consent (CNC)

Copied and reposted from this word press site--->  Consensual Non Consent - what is it?
I own nothing of this content ....

The two basic negotiation concepts used in the BDSM community are SSC (Safe, Sane and Consensual) and RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink). An extension of these concepts is consensual non-consent.

CONSENSUAL NON-CONSENSUALITY

A mutual agreement that within defined limits, or subject to a safe word or other restrictions, and to common sense, consent to activities is given without foreknowledge of the exact actions planned. Very common (and pretty much necessary!) for activities such as kidnap or rape play, where prior discussion would destroy much of the “atmosphere”—like spoiling a surprise party. Examples: an agreement that anything rated “2” or higher in a submissive survey is “fair game” for play, without additional discussion or negotiation; or negotiation of kidnap play in advance, but without disclosing when, where, or the details of the scene.

Fetlife: Glossary of Kink

The basis of consensual non-consent is: “I consent for You to do whatever You like to me without future negotiation”. There is just the first consent. Yes, I consent to whatever is going to happen, without needing to further negotiate what is going to happen. Obviously, strong trust is involved.

There are many reasons why consensual non-consent is a common way for BDSM partners to play. It is a strong reinforcement of the power exchange, and it supports mystery, spontaneity and excitement from the unknown. Many people argue that SSC (safe, sane and consensual) takes away the ultimate BDSM experiences in exchange for relatively safe exploration.

Of course, every kinkster needs to approach consensual non-consent with caution, particularly if you are new to BDSM or new to the partner you are playing with. You wouldn’t be the first person to get yourself involved in knife-play before realising that you are having your first panic attack, or discover that your Dom forgot to mention that He was into needles (and you forgot to mention that you are freaked out by piercing). Be careful. Psychological damage can ruin your fun, possibly forever.

There are others who don’t just “play” BDSM but live and breathe BDSM in everyday life. Often, consensual non-consent is established the moment the collar is locked. There is no need for further negotiation between Master and slave, simply because by that point both the Master and the slave have already established a strong understanding about each other’s body, mind and spirit. They know what works and what doesn’t, where the hard limits is, when things go wrong.

It’s not necessary that consensual non-consent is a goal in your BDSM journey. It’s not a progression or a rite of passage. How you play is up to you to choose and no style is “better”. It depends on what you want, who you are with and what you are comfortable with. SSC, RACK and CNC are all valid mottos to live and play by. The key over-riding principle is to stay safe and not let anyone push you into agreeing to something you don’t feel confident agreeing to.

IS CONSENSUAL NON-CONSENT SAFE?

Nothing is safe in BDSM, in fact, nothing is safe in life. Accidents happen every day with or without kink activities. But, we try to predict and minimise the risks.

Consensual Non-Consent may not be safe for people who are just starting to test out their kinks, because my experience is that a lot of BDSM activities are different than you imagine them to be. The whip in your imagination doesn’t taste the same as a real whip. Without real experiences, one can never be sure of what works and what doesn’t.

But, when there is trust and you and your partner have a good understanding of each other, consensual non-consent can allow you explore further than you might be able to otherwise. It can be a tool for going deeper and examining your limits.

How much is too much for my slave? Will putting him/her in a cage for 2 hours drive him mad? How about a day, a weekend or a week? What are the real limits? How far can this go?

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I have neglected this blog for awhile, my apologies, life gets in the way, also I run 2 Blogs on Wordpress, one is simply about my piddly @ss life from a little pov (except recently the adulty me has been posting) and the other is about Abuse of all types & human trafficking both subjects I am a survivor of, those 2 often get put into online magazines ( and I am so grateful for the exposure) also I have a 3rd that is a daily journal for my Mamma to keep tabs on me, it is also linked to my Tumblr which is a catch all hodge podge random mess of stuff I like or stuff I post. 

So for the next little bit I am going to start reposting resources  & blog links to great sources of info on various subjects within the BDSM world. 

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as always .. ask if you need to know something, correct me if I am wrong, tell me how I am going to hell etc in the comment box ( or you could just say hello) 

~Chaos Inc.~

So, you want to be a submissive~BDSM "family"~ Position training chart~various punishments

So.. you want to be a submissive because the idea of??????? appeals to you? arouses you? is a fantasy you hope to make reality? you are naturally submissive... doesn't matter why to me, I asked so you would have a question that requires you to think hard and look within yourself.. cause chances are fairly high that when a Dom is vetting you... that will be one of many questions.

Okay first there are different types of submissive, neither one is any better than the other, there is submissive, that is your label/title .. wear it proudly.. for clear understanding think of the differences are the degrees of submission, the 3 basics are Bottom ( submission light)..Submissive (submission medium) .. and Slave (submission maximum )
that is your basic foundation, off them you can add to each or take aspects of 1 and apply to the other according to your needs and what works best for you and your Dom, mix and match or create your own version, but regardless it will be built off the basic 3..

what's the difference between a bottom and a sub     << has resources & links to take you deeper down the rabbit hole...

What works for you and your Dom is called your Dynamics, you will catch hell from the purists.. you will hear shit like a slave is only this, does whatever their master wants regardless... and that is complete bullshit... that is their Dynamics and most likely it IS slavery in the traditional sense, for them they are traditional any other way is absolutely wrong in their eyes and they will tell crap like you are not a true slave you are just a sub...

a very well written essay on the difference between sub and slave

They are 100% correct you are not a slave according to tradition.. you are not the same type of slave as them... but that does NOT make them better than you, or you inferior.. you hold your head high and proud, don't ever let anyone kink shame you.. you are a slave just in your own dynamics, still a slave though .. just let them spout off, there is nothing you can say or do to make them change their stance.. what you can do is make them look like the elitists or cliquey club they are. and that is to simply ignore them, let them yip and yap until they are blue in the face, they will shut up eventually...you DO what you and your own Master do, you obey him/her no one else, if you are unsure how to conduct yourself properly discreetly ask your Dom,

Here is a simple rule to remember and this is for every single type of Submissive.. for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction...Basicly stop think, before you say or do something unbecoming of you, no matter how angry you are at those kink shaming, conduct yourself properly and accordingly  ( you will know how cuz you will have been trained) everything you say and do, good or bad is a Direct reflection on your Dom.. you will always want to protect his/her reputation and good name, so get self control and do your duties, tune out the yippy cliques and elitists ... if you are a little ( I am) you will hear really bad things , like you can't be a little and a submissive at the same time... bullshit, there are littles who are slaves ...
this is a very worthwhile watch, she is speaking from her heart and soul about BDSM what it is and how it has helped her it worth the 10 minutes
Milkwebs- BDSM Taught Me This

everyone in the BDSM world is like a global family, we share a common theme we are kinky and have lots of diverse fetishes, there is NO right or wrong way to be any sort of Submissive, just a different way,, thats it.. Diversity, acceptance, being all inclusive, any gender any sexuality, any skin color we are all one family.. the community is supposed to be friendly and welcoming from just curiosity to beginner to experienced..doesn't matter you are welcome to come join the family ... some of those elitists, forget that, and they forget they were once nervous and unsure of themselves, as well as new/novice themselves and they forget all the help the old guard and others gave them,
 and just so you know.. I too was once guilty of Elitism, 20+ years ago I am not and never was the perfect submissive, I am pretty sure perfection doesn't exist..but we strive for it anyway

So here is a chart, that you will need to memorize, its proper positions, your Dom will most likely train you at some point.. and No this is not for Slaves only.. its for Submissives of all types ...

Disclaimer: Before you carry out any of these punishments, make sure you’re not breaking any laws where you live... This is solely for informational purposes by mature, responsible adults, and I am not responsible or liable for any trouble you get yourself into with this information. Remember that each person’s pain/humiliation tolerance is unique, so use your best judgement. Always play safe, sane, and consensual!

To show that punishment doesn't mean beating the hell out of you subs ass, there are punishments far harsher that an ass whupping. I am NOT going to list the crimes cuz that varies from Dom to Dom, Dynamic to Dynamic, so I am just gonna do a short list of punishment that can be used....

#1- Have them take a shower in any way they like to, but when they are finished make them rinse their entire body in cold water for 2 minutes.

#2- Remove their right to use furniture. They must kneel on the floor next to you, sleep on the floor at night, etc.

#3- When they want to eat, make them cum in their own food before they can eat their meal.

#4- Sub must kneel on uncooked rice for 3 minutes with their hands placed behind their head. Then they must clean up the rice.

#5- Record their masturbation/sex noises and set it as their ringtone.

#6- While making sure impressionable or non-consenting people do not see, take them into your garden, blindfold them and tie them to a bench, leaving them there until you decide to retrieve them. Make sure the weather is cooperative and will not burn or cause them any physical damage.

#7- Forced naked exercise, such as yoga, pilates, jumping jacks, etc.

#8- Pick up twenty thumbtacks using only their breasts or ass, then spread rubbing alcohol on their breasts or ass.

#9- They must use their tongue as a towel upon your body after you have finished taking a shower. In this way, they will worship your body.

#10- Tie them to a bed and use a Hitachi Magic Wand on them, for forced orgasms. If they get too loud, gag them.

So I am gonna leave a great BDSM song lyric video below, and this is all I have for tonight. 

Thank you for stopping by, feel free to leave a comment or a question, hate on me or love on me.. if you hit the subscribe button I wouldn't have to PM links to you... just sayin xoxoxo

See you next post 

Leslianne xoxo

BOTDF- Safeword (lyric video)

Very Basic simplified layman's terms what BDSM stands for (BDSM 101 Basics for the misinformed)

Extremely simplified explanations in non technical terms that anyone can understand, ( especially the vanilla folks who are interested or curious) maybe it will help a novice with something they don't understand.. whatever, I am writing this for everyone cuz I can not believe the misconceptions...

BDSM is an umbrella for a great many kinks fetishes, Dynamics.. and it's not about sex,not all BDSM relationships lead to sex

It is not one big f*ckfest, it is nothing like that stupid 50 shades of rape movies, or magazines,I will put resource links throughout this post and at the end. in keeping with the KISS (Keep It Simple Stupid) guidelines, I am using, I am making use of Wiki..it isn't a definitive 100% reliable & accurate all the time, but it does provide links for resources 

The Definition of BDSM is clearly stated in that Picture above,
 Bondage is pretty straight forward, many Bondage folks go onto learn and practice Shibari & Kinbaku What is Shibari & Kinbaku & their differences, Bondage is not restricted to rope, silk strips are often used , chain, cuffs ( careful if using cop handcuffs they can really damage the wrist if used improperly) various restraints.

Discipline is more Self Discipline, mastering self control, self restraint, self conduct, mastering remaining calm in various situations positive or negative, controlling your own thoughts.. this takes years, it's a journey of self discovery and becoming the best person you can be, both Dom & sub do this, both are constantly learning, helping each other,the Dom may guide the sub in the right direction, may encourage the sub to not give up, and the sub gives their reassurances, and a good reason why the Dom is always striving to be the best they can be. Discipline is also learning to take direction, stick to schedules, Maintain rituals, completing tasks, Obedience - if your Dom calls you from work tells you what to wear, and you are to be at some restaurant or home or store, anywhere, at such & such time..doing so without question regardless of where you are and what you are doing ( this is an example) sounds simple enough, it is much harder than you think, you might be somewhere or doing something that will become awkward if you suddenly say you gotta go..thats just a small part of Discipline... it is NOT all about punishment and beating the h3ll out of a sub. yes it may contain elements of Sadomasochism, but not for all, just for who evers dynamics includes that.

Domination is pretty str8 forward I should think, it's being in control of the situation and the sub(s) their word is law, a Dom is short for a Dominant person ( male or female or somewhere gloriously in between) Dominant people have a Dominant personality,they are the natural leaders,the ones who people go to for advice or help or just want to be in their company,one of those people that are handed total control by their friends and family and end up directing the event without meaning to, and the Dom does it merely with their presence  one of those people who walk into a room and instantly grabs everyone's attention without saying a word, it is natural to them.
And submission is also pretty str8 forward, sub is short for submissive, which is the complete opposite of the Dom, they don't take control of anything, except for their own actions thought word and deed ( refer to Discipline).. they have responsibilities not control. a submissive is not a f*ck toy who has to obey your every desire, doesn't work like that... that is more in the realm of Master/slave situations..we will skip that for now and keep it simple. Also a Dominant never takes submission by force, if you force someone to submit.. you are raping and abusing them... submission is something the sub gives willingly.  for simplisticity, think of it as a Gift to the Dom to cherish and protect...the Sub can  take that back at anytime,( doing so may very well terminate the relationship) when it is given the significance of it is they are putting their lives as well as their Physical, Mental, Emotional & Spiritual health into the hands of someone else and trusting that person to protect them always, to keep them safe on every way,and trusting them guide them and help them grow in all things.. a Dom can't do jacksh!t to/with the submissive until the sub willingly gives the Dom their submission and control over them, after that the Dom can take control and stay within the realm of things that was mutually agreed on and consented to. The Dom can not just do as they please,unless that is your dynamics.

Sadism is the pleasure derived from inflicting pain on others...Dominants are usually Sadists to varying degrees, so are mildly sadistic, others can be extremely sadistic.

Sadomasochism Definition ,

Masochism is receiving pain from others and gaining pleasure from it. Submissives are usually Masochists to varying degrees, some are mildly Masochistic, others Can be extremely Masochistic.

the more you read and follow links to learn, the more you will understand our Dynamics when I begin talking about that ( and that will contain details of scenes, what jannie n I do and how and for who etc. what types of Doms are in our crew and what do they do etc.) As usual, leave some hate or love in the comment box, nice comments greatly appreciated as well, and any questions drop them there and I will answer, if I do not know I will find you someone that does
have fun exploring and experimenting xo
Lesli xoxo

As stated here are a few resource links where you can explore more in greater depth... I chose to keep it simple to be clearly understood.
BDSM Beginners Kit (1995) still valid
Things to try if you are new to BDSM
How to guide for beginners
BDSM Guide for new folks
Tips for Beginners ( lots of resource links)
** Please hit that follow button so I don't have to constantly send the links thru Messenger thanks**

A Blog post written expressly for you all to get to know me & what I am about

I am well known for long reads on my other blogs, guess its the same here.. sorry about the length, but I had a lot to say because there is a great deal of misconceptions about me and i want that cleared up, its not pissing me off, its hurting me.

What I do exactly on film ( or digital wtf evers now - I know jackshit about cameras)

I make 3 types of porn

#1 Home vids for personal use, these are for me & my partners & very few friends.... sometimes shown at a private Dungeon party as ambient background fluff

#2 Studio porn, not of the vanilla variety and not actual BDSM.. like 50 shades of grey it's not real non of it is what happens in the BDSM world.. its made to give vanilla folks a fantasy thats it (50 shades is all rape and abuse yanno)

#3 Educational Porn .. demonstration on how to do this or that, from how a BJ isn't just a dick in your mouth to how to deepthroat without puking or suffocating, how to fuck a guy or woman with your eyes while goin down on them etc to how to safely use impact and stingy toys/tools ...

to proper positions for those just learning how to kneel proper, what obedience submission is and it is the Dom directing this so he or she is explaining shit and teaching I am just a visual tool in that education also what BDSM is and that its got very little if anything to do with sex... if your dynamics include sex be happy, if not, be happy. etc these videos can be seen at BDSM conventions, fetish events,Sexpo's,.. a 3 day everything sex expo for vanillas mostly and kinksters they are instructional there is no one blowing a load or any orgasm its simply step by step instructional demonstration

This Educational porn is usually made at my Dom's house cuz the basement is a full on dungeon or at an acquaintances property or warehouse etc. one of my Doms is an educator gives talks and if I am oh so lucky a live demo with a crop cane or strap.. I hate the fucking paddles :(

Now the Rant....

There isnt a fucking snowballs chance in hell I will ever let a complete stranger see a vid I am in..

Also I make porn.. you seriously fucking think your dick is gonna impress me or even arouse me? seriously? and no I am not a fucking size queen, I actually dislike dicks that are 8 inches or more, I don't give a flying fuck how small it is either, it still can give and recieve pleasure so whats the fucking problem?

The only vids I can show are the private home vids.. so if I ever send you a short clip of one, its because I trust you and am comfortable with you and consider you a friend.... if you are Not my friend and I dont know you... you wont see any of them ever, so stop asking.( and yes they do exists because 1 or 2 guys have seen a clip or 2) and you can take that childish prove it, fucktarded comment, and ram it up your fucking ass.. I don't need to prove sweet fuck all you, or anyone about anything.. unless you are paying my bills, you dont have any fucking rights to anything about me or my life, nor do you have any fucking say at all in my life..

Believe what you fucking want, those who do know me, and that I consider a friend, know I am fucking str8 up legit so fuck you!

the Studio vids... just because I am in them does NOT mean I own them, I don't, the Studio and producers do, I can not upload even a 10 second sample and send it to anyone legally, there are other people in it, and I can lose my job... and I can get my ass sued off hugely.. I am not a millionaire I cant fight and win against a studio that has access to the best lawyers and can tie it up in the courts until I can no longer afford to defend myself... you jerking off for 30 minutes is NOT worth my time my job or my finances.. you want to see those videos get up off your ass go to the kink store and pay for the fucking DVDs like everyone else

the home vids are pleasurable to me, and are made with love because its my Doms, jannie and me. as for the studio vids... its a fucking job I get no pleasure, all I get is a bit of relief just enough to take the edge off for an hour if i am fucking lucky and I get a paycheck thats it

very rarely is it fuck uninterrupted making studio porn there is who ever is all there with me participating and sure as shit someone will lose their stiffness and need a fluffer .. or the asshole in charge of the lighting or sound got on frame by accident, or the director will stop you and tell you more of this or dont do that, or move this way so the camera can get it all or the bed/table/bench/ cheap ass st andrews will break or collapse while in use. its not a fuck fest.. its a job, .. you gotta memorize everything, try to sound convincing and then make the right noise at the right time and if you can't get the sound then they will make it very real for the 10 seconds of audio and sometimes that really fucking hurts you also have to be very aware of what is being done to you and when and how

you want to even remotely stand a chance of getting anywhere near me if you can not stimulate my mind, So get into a marathon conversation with me about energy from the universe, the energy within us and all living things.. the grande illusion we call life, lets discuss Schrodinger's cat and other beautiful theories, lets talk about Einstein's theories , or Darwin's , or the origins of man. too deep for you?

How about the Iliad? ( Homer's Epic Poem) .. or Dante's inferno in great detail and the meaning behind the stories, how about beliefs rituals customs law punishments of the 14th century thru to the 20th century how about Caligula ? or Vlad the Impaler (Dracula)

lets talk philosophy and discuss ideologies and when why and how they were created and their purpose etc

you look at me and think I am a dumb fucking blonde whore that makes movies easy fuck!!

other than the fact I make porn , play guitar for a career and I am into some very kinky shit and serious BDSM ...

what else do you know about me? who am I ? what happened to me in my past? what do I enjoy in life, what are my hopes dreams and desires ? do you even know what fucking country I live in? what kind of motorbike do I own? do I have any kids? what is my sexuality? what ethnicity am I? what are some of my hobbies? do I like to hunt? if so what do I use? if not why not? do I smoke? do I drink? do I do drugs? if so what? have I been to jail? have I been to prison? have I ever been with Royalty? am I friends with Royalty? if so which country? in what country am I an honorary citizen? what US city gave me a nice plaque with the "key to their city" mounted on it? in what country can I not walk down the street unescorted? why can't I? ...

no, you havent a fucking clue about me , all you see is female, porn, slut or whore and a easy fuck ...

I am so much more than a cum dumpster... I am a human being, I am extremely intelligent & very well educated, not from the north american bullshit colleges , actual knowledge, from multiple countries, I do have hopes and dreams I do have regrets, many of them ,I am far from perfect,

Why should I have to tone it down? keep a little more to myself? why should I have to hide myself?, not be open honest and upfront? act all shy? pretend I share your fucked up society's morals and values?, why can I not openly state I fucking love sex ?, why cant I talk about what I like?, why cant I be aggressive when it comes to sex or whatever?

... a guy can talk about all that shit and be very aggressive in bed... because in your fucked up heads he is a man and that makes it okay , women dont behave like that its wrong its unladylike it makes you look like a slut , its not okay... fuck off your misguided morals and so called values do NOT apply to me, I am not chained down by religious dogma, nor am I a slave to society..

sorry I m not a brainwashed sheeple I live my fucking life equal to any man or woman that is not open for debate, I am in control of my body no other human being will ever have any say in what I do with or to my body, that is also not up for debate..

I am not actually a slut or a whore by your very fucked up definitions ...

I am a woman who is aware that her body is meant to give and receive pleasure and I am not afraid to use it and enjoy it or admit it cuz I dont have those fucked up social restraints you do, I am sexually liberated, most of you are not.

I am NOT ashamed to be a woman, to enjoy my body, to be empowered, to be equal to men, I am every fucking thing you think women should NOT be & everything they are when they start fucking thinking for themselves...

I am fucking proud to be me and I won't let anyone shame me or silence me... you don't like me that is your fucking problem because I won't lose any sleep over it. you have any fucking problems with what I say or do... that is your fucking problem, I am NOT responsible for your reactions or your thoughts.

so why will I show my tits or ass in a photo? cuz I FUCKING CAN! and I do NOT feel shame, the human body is nothing to be ashamed of, regardless of size or shape or fucking gender...there is a reason why a woman's body is designed the way it is, there is a reason why she has tits on her chest and not on her belly like other animals... there is a reason why men's bodies are designed the way they are, there is a reason why men are generally taller bigger and stronger than women ... to attract each other.. its natures way of ensuring there will be generations of humans... why would I be ashamed of, or try to hide what nature gave me? thats just fucking stupid

.. my body is designed to be looked at, as is yours, everyones is.. I enjoy my body immensely, why would I keep it to myself?. why would I hide it? doesn't mean I wanna fuck you if I give you a pic, just means i felt like sharing. if I want to fuck you, male or female.. you will know cuz I will point blank tell you I want to fuck.. your call yes or no, If I havent told you I want to fuck you, then dont ask cuz you know the answer, I fuck.

Unlike the online billionaires with perfect lives and a fucking mansion..

I am actually real, I am not even a Millionaire, not even fucking close, I do NOT own mansion, in fact there is a good chance my humble little home is smaller than your fucking apartments, I don't drive a super car or what the fuck ever.. I drive a 2015 Chevy Aveo.. when its running , I prefer driving my 1993 chevy cavalier station wagon

The only vehicle I have that is worth any kind of serious coin is my Motorbike, and that is second hand, its 2 yrs old a 2016. I have good days and bad days, I deal with depression and suicidal thoughts all the time I am a normal human being no better than anyone, I am no fucking Diva , i may be a princessy girl but I am not afraid to get right up to my ass in oil and grease workin on a car, I get pissed off when I break a nail, I cry for stupid fucking reasons or even no reason!! I am emotional tho I try not to be, I just happen to have musical talent and it takes me around the world, and I just happen to do porn vids, so? anyone can do that? I may be a lot of things to people... but the one thing I am not is a Liar or a fake.. what you see is what you fucking get like it or dont, I dont give a fuck because I am not changing for anyone, I like being authentic, legit and true to myself.

Does this clarify shit for you? it better cuz I don't like fucking repeating myself, ... I will always answer questions openly and honestly always have always fucking will, I will always be friendly unless given a reason not to be. I am just me, no one special or of any importance, I am much much more than a whore than makes porn an I certainly am not an easy fuck...

have a great night/day all xoxo

Lesli